ardent bullshit comes down every faultline gushing heavily into jest kindly luscious melons nodding openly post quakes resting still to undermind various wonderous xylophones yawning zealously

Friday, December 30, 2005

Much Appreciated

Despite this weekend leaving poor, little me fantastically exhausted (yes, the wahmbulance is turning the corner), Wednesday & Thursday spruced up my spirit & reminded me what life is like without all of the holiday buzz buzz. Work's been a nice break before a few big deadlines but entirely too slow for my pace. Travelling ends up tiring no matter how you put it. And a descent night's sleep turned nonexistant for the entirety. Even Tuesday night proved alien to a good rest, since running on empty & plentiful holiday booze-ups aren't condusive to improving circadian rhythm. Blah blah blah.

So I took Wednesday off. Gone. Outa here. Splitsville.

But what to do on such a day? Lay around like a beached whale? A much needed cleaning of the abode? No way, Jose. I got in a trip to the Art Institute, one of the places I find peace in the city. Grabbing a sandwich, hopping on the bus & entering a world of a visual trip sans substances recharges me every time. And even before embarking on a day of adventure & unscheduled events, I received a wonderful package from none other than NK containing the Sarah Harmer disc unavailable in the states until February. Thank you thank you thank you!!! This pushed me into the calmed mood only brought on at the right time by a sweet female voice, a guitar and lovely lyrics.

And then it got better.

Not only had I gotten in a nice swim & time in the studio in the early week, walking through the loop heightened my muscle senses as a firm reminder why the couch & television could never give the satisfaction needed. Even found a terrific dive bar in Lakeview that night to blow off a little steam & play some pool, accidentally, in an attempt to wind down from one of the best days I've encountered in a few weeks.

And then it stayed great.

Despite a severe lack of sleep on Wednesday night (the 'i'll sleep when i'm dead' attitute is not panning out as anticipated), Thursday's work proved quite fruitful, as the big boss & I actually had a few moments to talk about a couple new projects he plans to put into action & how my involvement will benefit all. Upon returning home, I found the present I purchased for myself...a hardcover copy of My Autobiography by Charles Chaplin, which is out of print. And then the cherry of spending a whole evening with Nick, making one of my fav dinners & practicing for ANTM: HP style. Giving us the chance to play with our new cameras (those are Merlin, the testiless-faced cat's front paws). Regardless of our differences, it reminded me of his pure contribution to the world.

How did I ever get so lucky?

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Operation Domestication

Yay Christmas! Yay holidays! Presents presents presents! Backfat backfat backfat!!! I hear it, I swear, when I'm walking down the hall...the sound of belly jiggle. Yeah. Gross. But totally worth all of those fat-laden calories for the pure satisfaction of pecan french toast, beef wellington & fudge in my very happy tummy. Mmmmm....fudge, you thought you could get me to continue eating you but alas, Tron can sometimes outwit wholesome fudge by giving it away!!!

So far the Frango mints are the only things left to go. Who wants them?

As usual, Christmas turned out quite bittersweet and every year the same sentiments creep up into a generally happy personality...melancholy & a strong desire to be alone. Don't get me wrong, I want to see people but really don't want to let them down with my silly, dour mood so Merlin gets a lot of attention & I get a chance to get back into the regular workout routine.

Shut the hell up, Eeyore.

Ho hum. Okay.

Ho hum okay my ass. You aren't even excited about all of your presents? What's wrong with you, you ungrateful little brat?

Yeah. You're right. I guess I am really excited about seeing my family & spending a bunch of time with my brother & stuff. And I did get pretty much a whole new cooking set up so me & the new Cuisinart will be having quite a bit of fun.

Garlic for everyone!!!

But something's missing. You know? Like there's a void & I need to fill it.

Oh no. Don't even try talking yourself into thinking that eating all of those m & m's in your car is a good idea. Nosireebob. That's just dumb. So let's try to pinpoint the issue, k?


You had fun at your brother's, right?

As usual. Although I would highly recommend you not go out & get 40 year old virgin. It was a bad movie. Granted, it had its moments, but all in all, it was some bad stuff.

And mom's? Look at all that new kitchen stuff?! You're going to want to stay home & cook all the time before you know it.

Yeah. Maybe. And they were all wasted so it was funny to laugh at my wasted parents. Ha ha! Wasted parents!

Okay, and you always have fun with your dad because all you guys do it play pool & eat.

Usually. However this year there was a really weird dominance feeling going on in the new house with the stepmom and she had gotten a puppy the day before which was one of the cutest things alive and it kept her pretty busy it wasn't overwhelming. But my dad kind of outdid himself this year.

Oh yeah, how?

He showed the new bf porn.

Wait, what? Seriously? That's fucking awesome.

Yeah, not so much. Definitely made it into the Top 5 for embarrassing moments this year.

Really? So what are the others?

I thought you said my Top Lists are lame.

That's before I found out that you make one of the most humiliating moments of the year. Hop to it, kiddo.

So in closing...

Top 5 Most Embarrassing Moments of 2k5:
5. Sitting on chocolate at a tan-colored, cordouroy skirt...and the only pants I had to wear were sweatpants...and not cute sweatpants, mind you...the sweatpants that I paint in.

4. Gas (although flatulance is hilarious, there are times when it induces more redface than laughter)

3. Dad showing porn on Christmas AND then telling a story of a woman flashing him and I quote 'come on, they're just boobs, you know? they were alright but not that great'. Sweet.

2. Slightly hungover at work, explaining the show Police Squad (the Japanese Garden scene) & describing it as 'fucking hilarious' in a little too loud of a voice in front of faculty.

1. Family birthday dinner...Using 'speaking of incest' as a segue to talk about 'Middlesex' (read it) at the dinner table in front of about a dozen family & friends. There was more than one dropped fork & a roar of laughter. Yeah, not so clever.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Thought You Might Appreciate

Top 5 Most Boring Things About Today...
1. Work
2. The Bubble Game taking advantage of my slight colorblindness
3. The Sound of the air being pumped through the vent
4. The conversation I just had with a guy I dated like 5 years ago wishing me a Merry Christmas or something
5. My hair

Um, does anybody want to bring me some Chicken McNuggets & a drink? (see: cranberry juice + ginger ale would be best but I'd settle for a good bloody mary or some Black Velvet) I'd totally give you one of the McNuggets!

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Operation Gain 3 pounds this weekend=underway

Omigod. Have you heard the news? It was so cold in Chicago this week. It was totally crazy cold. Like the coldest cold since gosh, probably January. Bbbbbrrrrrrr!!! But today it's like 40 degrees (farewroewaurght, sp?), like an oven! So what do you do when it's so terribly cold outside? Well, one hell of a lot of shivering & walking fast & dressing up all bundly like Nick. Oh. And ice skating. We have to ice skate here because there are no hills to ski on. This is one reason why Chicago does suck. Ice skating is no where near as fun as skiing. But that's all we have (since there aren't even open toboggan hills in Palos anymore). Okay, okay, so I'm really not so good at ice skating, either, & much better at skiing, which I fully demonstrated to Erin a couple nights ago. If you also read Erin's blog, you know all about this & should probably quit reading this right now. That is unless you really liked her story & want to read about it again.


So we met downtown & I was totally productive by writing out all 3 of my Christmas cards on the ride downtown. Then I was thinking about downtown & that one song that we sang for Little Shop of Horrors popped into my head, you know 'Skid Row' because it talks about downtown & stuff. So Erin & I met up & headed out for our first mission...Peppermint Schnapps & hot cocoa. One of THE BEST WINTER DRINKS!!! The booze was the easy part, even though the guy who sold it to me totally didn't think I was 21. He asked & I was like, yeah. And then he looked at me all suspicious. Then we went on a 30 minute wild goose chase to find hot cocoa. Seriously, we totally could have caught some wild geese easier. And we definitely could have found some Wild Turkey a lot easier.

So then we got all of our stuff & went into this alley that was super-sketch & I looked at Erin & was all 'dude, i think i'm gonna puke. do you smell that?' & she was all 'omg. i totally wasn't paying attention but now i smell it. ew, gross!'. So we ran out of the alley & poured the booze into our hot cocoas in the middle of the street since we were in the loop & cops don't fucking care what you do in the loop as long as you don't bother them or you're not protesting a war that shouldn't be going on in the first place.

So then we went to Millenium Park & ice skated because the Daley Center had been taken over by a whole bunch of Germans. Everything was like Der this & Der that & we saw this baby Jesus set up & I was like 'hey erin, what do you think of that, being a jew & all' & we laughed because it was funny. So we went ice skating & she was all good & smooth & I was going really slowly, like how a really bad skater would skate but I didn't want to admit it so I blamed the skates. Dude, these skates suck. In all honesty, I was the one who sucked & actually almost fell down when she told me about some gossip. OMG! It was awesome but I can't tell you because it's a secret.

Ssssssshhhhhhhh...secrets...9% alcohol beer will get you very drunk even if you only drink 3 of them. Just believe me on this one.

So we warmed up after ice skating & hung out & talked about so much stuff & it was so fun that we're going to hang out on Christmas because, well, she doesn't believe in the Christ is our Savior thing & I'm really not up for watching a bunch of 50 somethings run around all drunk at my parents house after 'Bloody Mary Christmas' party this year...dear mom, please take that lampshade off of your head & put your shirt back on. thanx, your daughter... Maybe she'll watch The Golden Girls with me. That'd be awesome.

And last night was awesome, too, because I had a date. A first date at that. OMG! Like with flowers & everything but I was awesome & totally didn't sleep with him on the first date. How's that for some restraint? Huge. And I wore my cute little cordouroy (sp?) skirt. And I got all 'prettied up' & stuff. Maybe we'll have another date. Hope so because I'd really like to get laid.

Look, George Bush doesn't like cats. That's just one more reason not to like him. (stolen from jzn!)

And with that, I bid you good day. GOOD DAY!!!

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Is that you, Santee Klauss?

Despite a near breakdown buying wrapping paper today, I'm finally in the Christmas spirit. Why, may I ask, must the holidays put a smile on people's faces? Shouldn't we act kindly towards each other on a regular basis? Well, at least once a year the population tends to open up its collective wallet to charities (& of course, the economy misses none of this). Back to wrapping paper. Although I've thrown loose many of my previously 'anal' behaviors (see: the word 'thing' should not come up in any writing vehicle unless completely justified should not haunt my mind & the unacceptable use of 'to be' verbs) or at least tucked them away for the time being in the realization that there are more important activities to focus on right now, wrapping presents in very pretty ways will never leave this shorter than average person. Just because I wait until the week before Christmas should not mean that I can't find paper & ribbon to go together. After 30+ minutes of grabbing & matching (or mismatching in this case), I finally threw the towel in & decided on a blue with silver stars paper & silver ribbon. (note: the silver ribbon is NOT the one that I wanted but apparently Target does not feel the need to overstock gift wrap...bastards should know but since merchandise sells for less there, you are temporarily forgiven).

Is it parenthesis day?

Regardless, thank goodness Nick has some patience with such ridiculous behavior. Much love for enduring a slight tantrum. So there they sit, several lovely packages, under the tree just waiting for someone (plural) to tear them apart. I can't wait! Cookies for the neighbors fill the apartment with a sweet aroma. Ah, how nice. This year I have not told anyone their gifts (well, okay one, but there remains a good explanation as that I feared the gift would end up bought by the person in the next week). Other than that, I've refrained. Surely, da bro has not yet opened a gift when he didn't already know what it was until now.

But it's so difficult to keep wonderful surprises!

Speaking of wonderful surprises, tomorrow night's ice skating night (with flasks, cupcakes & fried chicken). Woot woot! Hopefully 5 hours of sleep will fuel me for an undoubtedly amazing adventure with Miss Mastermind. Laundry=done. Cookies=done. Time for bed=now.

This Austenish post brought to you by 3 beers & Taco Bell (tm).

Monday, December 19, 2005

Day off. OFF!

Top 5 things of today...

1. Doing nothin
2. Not going to work
3. Watching All My Children
4. Watching The Price is Right
5. Doing nothing (so great it's worth repeating)

Oh boy, do I love sitting in jammies all day every few months & not doing anything. Ah, how I love you Personal Holidays.

Sunday, December 18, 2005

One more new year's resolution bound to be broken

So this never was a problem, well, not so much a problem but an issue, until about 5.5 years ago...I'm habitually late. Not like 3 hours late but pretty much any time I say that I will be somewhere at a certain hour & minute, you can tack on about 5-15 minutes, depending on the severity of consequences for being late. Most of the time it's due to lack of realistic time allocation. Sometimes it's just that I don't want to be there & drag my feet to the locale. Regardless, the 'be on time all the time'ness of mom oh so deeply engraned in me lost its importance along the way. Thus...

Happy belated birthday, blog.

Ha ha. Happy birthday blog. You know, they should make silly e-cards for that. Surely, someone would use them. Anyhow, this time I totally have a great explanation...

So tonight was 1 of 2 Nutracker shows. So, how did it go, you may or may not be asking. Regardless of whether you care or not, I'll let you in on that it went pretty darn fabulously & I'm almost a bit sure that we topped out at over 400 in attendance, which isn't all that much but about 90% of the hall. And boy oh boy, was I nervous. NERVOUS!!! Seeing as I haven't been on stage in about 4 years, the nerves that I'd built up are gone. Kaput. Outta here. So walking into the audience area on my way into the dressing to get ready & looking at the stage had me more than a little frazzled. FRAZZLED!!! But then I remembered that I don't have any lines (duh!) so that calmed my nerves a bit. Well, that & the 3 shots of whiskey that I drank. Ha ha. Just kidding. You all know I'm not a whiskey girl.

But I'll drink it if you buy it for me. (maybe)

So we all did great, especially the Sugar Plum Fairy. She was magical in her pink tutu. What do you think people would do if I showed up to work in a tutu? I'd like to try this experiment but feel as if I just might lose my job, or at the very least have some sort of serious psychological exam. And I like my job so I'd rather not lose it. Back to the point. Wait, speaking of the point, that's what I bought today. The Point by Nillson. My dad suggested it (& I remembered that a friend of mine saw it & was looking at buying it but didn't about a year ago or so & we tend to have similar tastes in music) & I saw it today, so I bought it for myself for Christmas or Hannukah or Festivus or whatever. Honestly, I think it was just a reason to wrap something up & put it under the tree. Okay, no, seriously, so I got home & decided that I would make cookies for the cast. But while I was at it, I may as well make cookies for the people that are coming to my apartment tomorrow. Cookies are nice, right? So I started baking cookies, listening to some rad house music to pump up my already super pumped up self & remembered that I needed to remember something. But what was it? fed=check, showered the harispray shellac out of hair=check, cookies not burning=check, underpants=check, auto insurance=oh shit, I totally need to pay car insurance today (you see, I may be late on some things but bills, like ninjas, are nothing mess with). That needed to be done so it got done which is now=check. And that's the reason I was late on the blog birthday post. Phew!


Friday, December 16, 2005

Top 5 of the Day

Holy crap, it's here.

What's here?

The end of the calendar year (according to the calendar on the wall, that is).

But that's like 2 weeks away.

Yeah, but still, you've gotta start bucking up for all of the 'top lists'.

Whatever, yours are lame.

Perhaps, but I figure I'd start

Top 5 things that irritate right now...
1. My Humps chorus going through my head for the last 2 days. Seriously, people (or BEP's to be specific) that song should have NEVER BEEN RECORDED, let alone shoved out into the radio world. 'My humps my humps my lovely lady lumps' is terrible. And to think that I acually played one of your songs during radio time circa 2001. Sad. Just sad.

2. Really nothing else. Thus making this the crappiest 'top 5' list ever.

No no no no no. That's the only thing that's pissing you off? Come on now. What about your stepmom?

Yeah, I'm a bit too tired to even feel exhausted my her.


Um, yeah. I'm gonna go to bed now.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005


Monday, December 12, 2005

Oops! I crapped my pants, again. (but not as much this time)

Me & my dumb ass decided that I should stay up & write for a while on Thursday night. It had blizzarded so I had a lot of energy. You see, when it snows a lot my body gets all excited to go skiing but that trait is absolutely useless around here. USELESS, since the largest incline we have, well, nevermind, it just doesn't exist. So by Friday night, after more hours of rehearsal than sleep I was tired.


But my phone rang & I was all...'hello'...& the other line was all 'hey, still up for the caribou show tonight'...& my body was all 'NO!'...but my brain was all 'but if you don't get up & return those movies you will have late fees & you know that there is nothing worst or a greater waste of money than late fees so you may as well just get up & drop those off & keep driving'...but my body was all 'well, fine, but i'm not showering'.

Oh yes you are.

So I trudged up to the Northside. Putting on cute clothes & skinny jeans did not work their usual magic & I was still all 'hmmmph' & 'blechk' & 'boogety boogety boo' (ha ha, just kidding about that last one). So we headed into Subterranean & it was smokey, even for me & my eyes got all dry & itchy. So some guy with a guitar was on stage & he was just alright & he played a cover of 'Come on, Eileen' & then these 3 guys that emitted cockiness & jorky porkiness headed up to the stage next & they were all acting like they're the baddest thing to come out of the uppermiddle class but they were pretty good. But the way that a 'jam band' is pretty good, you know? Entertaining, fun, not so much real music.

Worth checking out for 3-5 dollars.

By the time Caribou came on it was like 11:55. 11:55 is late. And they just popped. Popped all over the place with this amazing sounding sound & so big but so simple & very very very clear. And they have all of this percussion stuff in their band, which when done correctly is awesome. AWESOME! They had 2 drummers so it was like double my fun because you all know how I have a thing for drummers. Don't ask me why, I don't know. Probably because they're the quiet ones in the back & that interests me or because they control the tempo of the song or maybe because I was a flute player & we're supposed to go out with the drummers or maybe just because an awesome musician is an awesome musician but I notice it more with percussion because I have no idea how they could ever move their arms & wrists & hands so quickly & precisely. Regardless, these dudes were great. Completely on. ON. So on that I woke up. And then they played 'Bees', so I closed my eyes & let my brain play around with the different layers in that song. MMmmmmmm....musical layers with the recorders & keyboards & voices & guitars & drums. Delicious. And they played a whole bunch of more songs & I could see the drummers' sweat on their foreheads from the 2nd floor & it was just great. Boy did they ever show us how passionate they are about music. So passionate that one of the drummers broke one of his snare drums. Bang! Bang! Bang!

Wow! So that was awesome. So so so so awesome. There were like 12 or 15 duo drum sequences but they weren't boring like a lot of drum solos can be, you know, when you're like 'okay, you can stop that silly, annoying noise now, please'. Dead on. And no, this was no '+2's. It is unfair to challenge anyone to that level of accomplishment. Plus, the '+2's played at the Museum of Comtemporary Art, which has no smoke & chairs. However, Caribou has comfortably squeezed itself into the top 10 concerts of all time.

So that was a really great night. And I got to work today to find out that I 'have to' take 2 more days off of work by Jan. 1 or I'll 'lose' them. Now watch, all of my dreams will come true & Santa will bring me a basket full of kittens & those 'blondie' bars (the good ones) & some prociutto-wrapped cantalope & some good long johns. Okay, gotta go.

Friday, December 09, 2005

Blink Blink

Okay, so I'm soooo excited because there are 2 birthdays this week of superfun great people. Nick & Erin have birthdays on the 10th & 13th respectively. Party time!

The last couple days have been all 'all over the place' kind of. Well, more like the last week & a half. Today was a double blinking day. You know, when stuff happens & you just react with a blank stare & 2 blinks.

Double blink. Not juicy double.

But it's all starting to slow down & come together. Just like a puzzle. Like today, there's this contract that we've been working on since June. June! Remember June? That was a pretty fun month. It was definitely a warmer month. So the contract is FINALLY getting done so that we can do some stuff with Epo & somebody else can do some other stuff with it & test what we did or something & we get paid & the IP but the company gets first rights to it if we discover anything, like a new continent. Ha ha, just kidding. All of the continents have been discovered. Unless the continent exists in dark matter but then I guess not but are continents really continents in dark matter?

Blink blink.

So I'm on my way to URA (University Research Administration) (pronounced: UUUUURRAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! (exclamation necessary since it's a pretty dull place & you really need to psyche yourself up to go over there)) & I see this dude smoking. Now, mind you that other than ONE DAY last week I have not brought cigarettes to work in like 4 weeks now (or something like that). This is good because I like cigarettes but know that I should not smoke them. Well, I like them other than they cost entirely too much money & they make your hair smell not like the shampoo you used & the health affects aren't all that positive. Like slowing your circulation by causing plaque in your aeortic valve or something & increasing your risk of an heart attack or stroke & cancer.

Blink blink.

Anyhow, I really wanted one so I asked this guy if I could bum one & he looked at me like I was an enormous blue lobster, all weird-like, & said 'no'. Uh, okay. Maybe he didn't think that I'm over 18 years of age (which I am by like 8 years & some change) & was thinking 'no way, this girl is like 17' but I really haven't looked 17 since I was about 22 (shortness gains you anti-years) so I don't know what his deal was. Probably that he paid for them & I didn't. But you see, bumming is the universal language of smokers. I've bummed from people that spoke absolutely no english & bummed to those who didn't speak a lick of my native language. He probably just didn't feel like it.

Blink blink.

So then I picked up a Pepsi for one of the girls that I work with & saw these health bars who's slogan is 'think thin' (yes, I realize that this is marketing, target market, placement right above the 'chips' conveniently the slogan is placed on the back of the box, selling a happiness, all that bullshit). Wouldn't it be nice if it were that easy? Just thinking about thinness would make you thin or something (I'm even buying into the schemes). Well, let me tell you, just thinking about thinness doesn't work. (see: the obesity rates in the US) Unless, maybe if you obsess enough & develop an eating disorder which is probably rooted in something else since a tried & true eating disorder isn't something that you just wake up with usually.

Blink blink.

So then I went to Anil's memorial service & listened to sweet stories for an hour and a half. Lots of people were crying. I said goodbye to a friend.

Blink blink.

And then I met some of Jaimster's art student colleagues in the loop for dinner in the middle of a blizzard. They are some neat folks, let me tell you. Their genres are all different. Unfortunately, so far they've sat in their studio for 10 days (8 without sufficient heat), with zippo communication (other than the Mooney Foundation, which really doesn't count) with the outside world, knowing no one in Chicago, sick & with no supplies. They were a lot cheerier than most people I know would be in the situation but still quite down-trodden appearing. One of which may go see Caribou with me tonight. The radiator in the living room is making strange, airplane-about-to-take-off noises right now.

Blink blink.

To complete the night, day, whatever, one of The Physicists & I hit up the pub & listened to some Shania Twain (not our choice), The Replacements, Bjork & The Boss. Cheetos sound really good right now.

Blink blink.

Ajax, I'm gonna steal a phrase...This random post brought to you by a slowly-hissing-the-carbonation-out-bottled-up mind.

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Ha ha. I'm lame & not faxing to Japan & making itineraries.

How many bands can you name?

You may have to click on the icon because Blogger photos is acting like a bit of an asshole right now.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005


Quick quick quick.

First, I need the name (or recommendation rather) of a good restaurant in Chicago that offers home-style, comforty food (mac & cheese, meatloaf, that type of stuff). Thought I knew one then realized that I'm retarded & it's in Fort Collins. I'm taking a special someone out for his birthday on Saturday & that's what he wants. Also, we'll be hitting up GameWorks on Saturday for this special someone's special 22nd birthday. Lemme know if you want to go & I'll provide more details. Promises to be fun.

Second, Natural Kinds (or any other lovely Canadian), could you set me up with the new Sarah Harmer? From what I've heard it's pretty good & it doesn't come out in the states until February. (sad face) Will be reimbursed fully & will love you 4eva.

Write more about newest big adventure later...see: emmy becomes a tour guide for foreign artists, it's goin' be aaaarrrrrrrrrsome!

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

now she's a little boy in spain playing pianos filled with flames

Question of the day...

Why do people drive (& park for that matter) like douchebags?

Saturday, December 03, 2005


Guess who's coming? No, seriously, guess who? Give up?


During this dour week (see: many unfortunate incidents) a ray of sunshine has shone upon this little being. Jaimie's coming to town. (sorry Santa, but surely you's JAIMIE! please bring me lots of shiny, wonderful presents. thanks, tron) And for 2 (count 'em 2!) months at the end of January. Wow. Awesome. Great. Violently happy. And despite the superhappy, celebratory-worthy news I've opted for the less energized version of a Saturday night.

A visit to Target earlier today left me drained. DRAINED. Carts & people & no parking & allergy attacks spurred by the laundry detergent aisle & later intensified in the candle aisle (goddamnit i just want some UNSCENTED candles no vanilla no jasmine no evergreen no vanilla i now have 100 vanilla scented tea candles after fighting an insane sneezing attack).

I lost my nose in aisle 5. If you find it, I'd really like it back. Thanks!

So with a lack of energy & a shitton of housework I've opted for the less excited but more fulfilling evening. Laundry's almost done. Only thing to do left is to light a kindafire, read a proposal & finish a bottle of wine. Ah Winter, I missed you. Please don't tell Summer because come February I'll really miss It.

Thursday, December 01, 2005


Wanna know what I do most mornings?


Okay, then. I won't tell you.


So I have an assignment at work. It's a very special assignment & I probably shouldn't even be telling you about it but I will. Sssssshhhhhhhh...secrets! Ha ha. Just kidding. It's totally no big deal.

Operation Photographer.

Yeah, so in between stuff being sent to me for Monday's deadline I'm walking around taking pictures of these science guys (& 2 science ladies) to put up in a Faculty Directory. And man, oh man, are they adorable & hilarious. It's really quite endearing. 2 of them have asked if I could wait for a couple days since they were going to go get haircuts but didn't want the picture right after the haircut so they wouldn't look silly. A couple have wanted a 'jungle theme' & positioned themselves among a bunch of plants (one of which was the cute, young, hot-to-trot prof who I'm all 'Tarzan & Jane?' no, not really i just was all shy & like 'um, do you like any of these?'). One of them wanted me to take a picture of him with his molecule. Another one wanted a small stuffed whale in the picture (he's the one who comes into my office & farts loudly & pretends nothing happened) & then read me quotes out of the Webster's Quote Book for like 45 minutes & looked up my initials in the Medical Acronym Dictionary.

Early Memory, Ejection Murmur, Electromagnetic, Emergency Medicine, Erythema Multiforme, Erythromycin...just to name a few.

So that doesn't really take all that much energy since it's just pointing & shooting & smiling & listening to Thanksgiving stories, so my mind starts to wander. Lots of different stuff comes into my brain but I stay focused on one thing in particular...dinner. See, I made egg salad last night after America's Next Top Model (THANK GOD JAYLA'S FINALLY GONE!) only I didn't make it as well as I usually do. It needs more salt. So that left my tastebuds expecting more. Yearning for something & the orange just didn't cut it. So now I'm sitting, waiting, obsessing over what I want for dinner. Should I make pasta? ice cream? soup? maybe all of them? And then I think of the time & preparation which would go into any of them, right, since the kitchen's still not totally clean from Saturday night. But then I think hhhmmmmm....I could do laundry & clean & make dinner at the same time. But if I do that, then swimming after work wouldn't be such a great idea because I would end up staying awake until like 1 a.m. because I'll get distracted & we all know how the 2nd half of doing laundry take 3x as long as the first half with the folding & all, which I don't want to do. But I do want to swim, I think. So where does that leave us? Is there an us? What if I'm taking everything out of context.

I'll probably end up getting some Taco Bell.