ardent bullshit comes down every faultline gushing heavily into jest kindly luscious melons nodding openly post quakes resting still to undermind various wonderous xylophones yawning zealously

Wednesday, January 25, 2006


So for like a year I've been all...Merlin the Testi-faced cat this & Merlin the testiless-faced cat that. You see, he had a gray, testicle-looking thing on the side of his face for a while (for total reals, you could ask anyone who saw it). Turns out it was a cyst. And no, I'm not a bad pet-haver & didn't do anything about it. The vet said that it was harmless & to leave it alone unless something happened, since he's so old & stuff (he'll be 17 in the!) because we want to avoid any sort of unnecessary anesthetic (sp?). So in May or so something happened & he had it removed. He is now Merlin, the testiless-faced cat.

He is adorable.

But you already know that. So we were sitting around the other day 'shooting the shit'. You know, like 'hey was your day' & he was all 'merrooooooooow' & I was all 'really? no way! that's wild! I had to deal with Dr. Jerkface again but he's not so much of a jerkface & trying to change his salary this time around. he just calls me like 70-hundred times a day to tell me that he's not done with his proposal but whatevs'. He gave the same look as always when I come home but a little sad. So I sat down next to him & asked what was wrong. He let out a long deep 'mooooowoooooooooow'. Since I don't know cat (goddamnit) so much & have to interpret a lot of it, I did. I took it as 'hey lady, you've had that fucking camera for like 4 weeks & have taken about 3 million pictures of me but have posted absolutely no pictures (other than that one of my paws & the one where I'm in the dark almost completely under your dining room table) of me on your stupid blog'. This threw me for a little bit of a loop since cats don't usually know about technology & stuff but hey, you never know what he is actually doing while I'm at work. He's a smart little fucker & has completely trained me to do what he wants.

Thus, dear blogosphere, meet Merlin.

p.s. This post brought to you by a tough ballet class & working from home (sucking out all creativity) at 10 p.m.


Blogger Electronsean said...

ack! one of my kitties is also siamese! we are twins (or at least they are)!

1:51 PM

Blogger emertron said...


2:18 PM

Blogger screetus said...

That's pretty impressive cat-speak

8:58 PM

Blogger Captain Bee said...

The meow interpretations are key.

11:59 AM

Blogger J-Mo said...

Howdy Merlin

4:01 PM

Blogger emertron said...

Yeah. I try. He's given me some lessons. Oop! He's saying 'hi' right now to everybody. (that's the short 'maaroow' for anyone interested in feline linguistics)

11:02 PM

Blogger jstar said...

ahh how cute! i've heard siamese are usually mean, but this is not the case w/ your cat?

6:53 PM

Blogger emertron said...

Absolutely not. He's a sweetheart. I've had Siamese all my life & they've been wonderful the whole time. Surprisingly, many of them are REALLY good with babies & children.

8:54 PM

Blogger Jaysie said...

you'll have to teach me a few key terms so i can wow merlin at our next engagement.

6:19 PM

Blogger emertron said...


6:53 PM


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