ardent bullshit comes down every faultline gushing heavily into jest kindly luscious melons nodding openly post quakes resting still to undermind various wonderous xylophones yawning zealously

Thursday, January 12, 2006

News Flash!!!


bee beep bee beep bee bee bee beep beep beep!

Heat Wave...Chicago is not only feeling a nice, above-freezing day, the sun is out. Holy Moly, it's January. Chicago's not supposed to see any sort of sunlight for at least 2.5 more months & it should be as cold as cold can be right now. It's supposed to be all icky & drab & ho hum around here & so we get all depressed & mope around & not pick up our feet so much when we walk. Operation Hibernation will just have to be aborted temporarily.

So not only did I have to wear sunglasses walking to work & didn't need mittens & could still feel my very tiny fingers (seriously, my hands are like the size of a 10 year old's), I get in ON TIME for morning meetings about budgets & forms & deadlines & stuff and THEN find the following (compliments of philogynist).

Apparently, CN (that's Chuck Norris for all of you not hip to the scene) has taken the time out to write about these 'rumors' being spread around about him on the internet. Wait, what? Chuck Norris Fun Facts are 100% totally true. I think maybe this is just his way of staying humble, you know? Which is part of his amazingness. But he won't admit it because comeonnow, let's face it, once you start talking about how humble you are, you just blew the deal. Or maybe it's just a good way for him to plug his books or something. (no!) But then I kept reading & came across this part, which shattered my faith & hope in CN. Walker is a friend of Billy Graham.

I'm going to go cry in a ball under my desk now.

10 Comments:

Blogger J-Mo said...

JAnuary should always be nice like this. I"m loving it......ewww i sound like a mcdonalds commercial.

4:43 PM

 
Blogger nk said...

I really like CN's response. Quite elegant, really.

Toronto is hot, too. It makes me happy.

6:44 PM

 
Blogger Electronsean said...

Chuck Norris can breed cats with frogs and have them shoot lasers.

1:12 AM

 
Blogger Captain Bee said...

Chuck Norris and David Hasselhoff is instant respect for the blog.

11:25 AM

 
Blogger emertron said...

Yes, ES, he can. CN has amazing powers.

The Hoff went the high school at the high school in the next town over. We could still feel his resonance from years before. Sometimes you could still hear the hoff...hoff...hoff cheers coming from the walls of LT. Then we'd go & kick their asses in swimming.

6:32 PM

 
Blogger ica said...

that picture is too adorable.

6:59 PM

 
Blogger Spo said...

when i grow up I want to be chuck norris's left leg

2:33 PM

 
Blogger emertron said...

That's quite an aspiration, Spo.

3:01 PM

 
Blogger reverse_vampyr said...

In that picture, is Chuck doing super-step aerobics or is he getting ready to water the plants?

1:41 AM

 
Blogger emertron said...

I think a little bit of both.

9:21 AM

 

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