ardent bullshit comes down every faultline gushing heavily into jest kindly luscious melons nodding openly post quakes resting still to undermind various wonderous xylophones yawning zealously

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Hump Day!!!!


Man, what a TERRIBLE nickname for a day. Not only is it incredibly inappropriate, it's just stupid.

Just because there's not humping in your immediate future doesn't mean you have to be an asshole about it.

Hey, how do you know that there's no humping in my immediate future?

Because you have a date with a boy who doesn't like girls tonight.

Oh shit. I guess you're right. At least I can rely on a fun, completely nonthreatening time. Wait, I was going to tell a story.

And I tried to get your off track. 1, me. 0, you. Loser.

Whatever. So anywhoodle, Wednesdays suck because there are alway people running around saying "Happy Hump Day" or whatever. Well, the day sucks but the nights are awesome because of America's Next Top Model. (boy I hope that Jade kicks off soon or I'm totally sending that bitch hate mail) But back to the days sucking. Sucking until today that is. You know what today is?!?!?!

THE START OF $1 MILKSHAKE DAYS!!!!!!!!!

Yep, the beauty of working on Wednesdays has once again been restored because Spring has sprung and along with crocuses(i) out in full bloom, it's the only time of the year that the city doesn't smell gross & Daylight Savings Time becoming my very best friend, Campus Milkshake Day has rolled around and upped the quality of life for those of us on the southside. Mmmmmmmm....

And then tonight I have a gay date. (no, really, my date is gay) The 2nd bbq of the season (1st one was Monday night, complete with 40s & brats) is tonight. I'm making my super-special awesome hamburgers in the hopes of a big strong (staight) man flirting with me in my little khaki skirt, shocked at how he's never had a better burger. Okay, okay, so maybe it'll be more like eating burgers, drinking beer & talking science & music but still, I WILL be wearing a skirt. Yay! Too bad it'll be wasted on pastey scientists & Mr. My Head's Too Big For My Body So I Look Like A Goddamn Lollipop Man (who'll prolly be there...maybe we should rekindle the flame a year after we went out...ha ha ha...that's just gross). Sigh.

Happy Milkshake Day!!!!

9 Comments:

Blogger Ajax said...

dollar milkshake, wow!

3:54 PM

 
Blogger J-Mo said...

Happy humping milkshake day.

Anytime you're looking for a date with a straight male that you can cook burgers for in a skirt.....let me know.

3:56 PM

 
Blogger Homeperm said...

you must be like a whole season ahead of me in a's ntm. i don't even think there is a jade. there has just been a lesbian affair sort and the straight one has been kicked off.

also, good luck at the bbq!

7:27 PM

 
Anonymous Anna said...

Happy ANTM Day! That's going to be my new greeting on Wednesdays...

Maybe if we focus our Jade-hating thoughts, we can WILL her off the show!

8:04 PM

 
Blogger Marisa said...

Oh no you didn't just say prolly -- I say prolly. Will, she said prolly!

$1 shake day and a Rufus Wainwright concert are the only reasons I'd go back to campus. Thanks for the reminder. I'll prolly see you in line next Wednesday.

11:13 PM

 
Blogger emertron said...

Ajax: yes, it's not just a beautiful dream.

J-Mo: If you're ever in Chi (during spring/summer/fall) I'll totally grill for you in a skirt.

HP: Yep. Sounds like you guys are a 'cycle' behind us. Last season was pretty good, though. Just wait until the granola bar/energy drink incident!

Anna: Yes, with enough effort we can will her off. Can't give any more spoilers for Homeperm for this season but will say that this week made me sad, too.

Marisa: Psychic southside twins!!! If you do decide to hit up $1 day at Hutch lemme know, I'll totally meet you there!

12:54 AM

 
Blogger ica said...

who says happy hump day? i've never heard of this! does it date back to elementary school?

10:14 PM

 
Blogger Jaysie said...

ninety-two cent milkshake day. we need to go every wednesday.

9:53 AM

 
Blogger emertron said...

Jaysie...it's a date. 4-eva!! (or until they stop doing it in the fall)

11:18 AM

 

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